The way we treat others teaches them how we want to be treated. Even if this is not our intention, in treating others a certain way we give permission to be treated in the same way. This happens unconsciously, without us realizing that this pattern/way of being has now become solidified.
I found myself being mean to a loved one recently. I could not understand why I was being mean to them, and even beat myself up about it later. In examining further, I realized that they had been mean to me in the past, and currently were still mean to me occasionally, more passively now that I am an adult.
This person gave me permission to be mean to them, by being unkind to me. My autopilot was adhering to this unwritten inner wiring.
What if I recognized this pattern and made a conscious effort to choose to be kind, set healthy boundaries, and not be mean in my interaction with this person. What if I consciously chose kindness for myself and every other human. No matter how they treated me, no matter what their behaviors consciously taught me, no matter what permission I believe was given to me by them.